Mind-space – Fundamental Shift

Meaning of Life…

Why you should always ask why

I’ve been asked on several occasions what is the meaning of life??? Well I’ll tell you… The meaning of life is whatever you decide it is for you. There is no purpose or value that is greater than your own and that goes for everyone. So what is the meaning of life for me? To give more than I take and to make a difference in some ones life other than my own. To feel worthy of the life I was given by being significant to the ones around me. It’s not them that gives my life meaning or purpose but without them I can’t say I’d have much of one, It is the feeling I get from my significance in their life that brings me joy and happiness. It is also what makes me want to do and be better.

To become fulfilled and have inner peace you need acceptance. Not from others but from yourself. If you cannot accept you for who you are you can never be happy or fulfilled nor find peace within. If it is happiness you are looking for then you will be disappointed for most of your life. Don’t want tomorrow when you haven’t lived today, it will always leave you empty and awaiting what you think you want. I mean once you have what you think you want then what?

It’s easy to get wrapped up in society and the world around you, influence and expectations of others, but you can’t forget who you are or why. Personally I like to learn any and all things and wake up everyday knowing that I am ignorant. For most it would be hard to say “I’m ignorant” and accept that to be true because egotistically you feel like you are not dumb. Indeed you are, you can not possibly know what you don’t know and what we don’t know is far greater than what we do know. So keeping the state of mind that knows I have much to learn, keeps me open to possibilities and knowledge.

We never learn if we already know it all and that’s why I get up knowing today I may know more than I did yesterday but there is far more that I don’t. This helps me grow because I am more open to others opinions and beliefs. Your meaning of life has everything to do with interpretation and perception on things and your environment has every influence on what you think and believe. You perceive things in your own way and that forms your own meaning of life. It can mean whatever you want it to, your not limited by a belief, because you can always choose to believe something different. One way or another doesn’t have to be the only way of living or believing.

Purpose

Having a purpose in life is what some would say gives their life meaning. Having purpose is more fulfilling as well and gives you a reason for living and doing the things you do. Most people have a hard time finding their purpose or place in this world and that’s because they are looking for something although they don’t know what. When you are looking for something you usually miss what’s right in front of you and your purpose usually comes from what’s right in front of you. To make this a little more insightful, it goes back to interpretation and perception, what you choose to see is what keeps you where you are or allows you to grow. If you are open to different interpretations or perceptions then you can expand your world view and also expand your own possibilities.

“You’ll never find yourself by being wrapped up in someone else”
Colleen Hoover

Everyone sees their purpose as different when indeed it is all for the greater good. The greater good being your own beliefs and perception. What you believe is your purpose is based on what you see and how you see it. However you have to stop and ask yourself is it your greater good or does it contribute to the greater good of humanity? Is what you do to work towards your purpose really a purpose that the fellow man can benefit from in a progressive way? Having a purpose is what gives your life meaning and everyone’s is different based on perceptions and belief systems, which as we’ve discussed can be changed as we progress.

Perception Or Deception

Is what you know your own perception or is it someone else’s expectations or beliefs that you’ve incorporated into your own B.S. (belief system)? The concepts in which you’ve seen, heard and learned from have indeed formed your own B.S or (belief system). So in order to find your own purpose and develop your own perception of things you have to be able to make sense of what you believe. Ask yourself is what I believe something that makes sense? If so then how? If not then why do you believe it? If you find yourself wondering why you ever believed something that you now discover doesn’t make sense chances are it’s because it was always someone else’s B.S that you never questioned.

Knowing that you can now choose to believe something else that makes sense to you. Now you have a different perception and interpretation of what is and what can be so you can develop your own B.S. in a way that helps you to find your own purpose in life and know that it is your own and not someone else’s. We lie to ourselves all the time trying to make sense of what we believe because we don’t understand that we can change that belief to fit our own perception not the other way around. You can’t force yourself to believe something unless you know why you believe it and if it makes sense to you.

Reprogramming the Subconscious Mind

We are all conditioned to be a certain way, rather it’s done purposely or not isn’t the question today. The question today is can we change our conditioning and if so how? This answer does not come easy but yes we can. I have spent thousands to experience my own perspective of this subject and as it turns out yes we can change anything we want. It all begins with the subconscious mind though. See that is where we are conditioned and everything we do is habitual behavior that comes from a pre-programming. Our subconscious is something like a super computer that holds all the data we need to function. We process data every minute of everyday and most of it is through the subconscious mind.

How much we actually focus and concentrate on something in this day and age is very small amount. There is so much going on around us all the time. Most jobs don’t require critical thinking skills in order to do the job, so a lot of the time, it’s just habitual behavior that’s created. Then going with the motions are easier and we do so without thinking about it. The way we think and feel have everything to do with our subconscious, and it is programmed from a very young age. Ages 1-6 to be exact. The repetitive abc song and all the things we learn as a child are forever in our minds as knowledge we will use for the rest of our lives, rather we like it or not. Well not really, you see because our minds tend to forget the knowledge we don’t typically use or need to survive.

Mind the bend — *Road to nowhere!* *Turn around.*

Steps to reprogramming the subconscious

Creating mind space
Expanding your awareness
Accepting and aligning yourself
Repetitive and habitual thoughts and behaviors

Creating mind space

Our subconscious is constantly at work even when we’re sleeping. The first thing you have to do when trying to create better habits and reprogram your entire perspective is clear some new space. Going back to the subconscious being like a computer, you can’t really install new hardware until getting rid of the old. Sure you can just rewrite the data or in this case just try and learn a new way of thinking, but when you do that with the old data, it’s still there to be used and will only get in the way. So anything that you may be holding onto like, guilt, shame, fear, resentment, and any other old habits or expressions you use that you know hold you back have to go. You have to accept that things can and will change if that’s what you really want. Understand that you can’t get where you going with the way of thinking that got you to where you are.

Expanding your awareness

To become consciously aware of your thoughts and language patterns are an essential part of the process. We can’t change something if we are unaware of it. The way you talk to yourself is the way your subconscious is programmed to think. If you’ve only ever gotten negative results chances are this is a negative programming. When you say things like “It’s just how I have always been” that’s your acceptance of something you don’t think you have the power of changing. When you have a backup plan in case you’re original plan doesn’t work out, you’re dooming yourself to fail. When you say things out loud (true or not) your subconscious is recording and it doesn’t know the difference in real or not, true or not. It only knows it’s repetitive and habitual thoughts.

Accepting and aligning yourself

In order to reprogram your subconscious and your current way of thinking you have to be very certain you don’t want to continue on the same path you’re on now. Most of the time it just takes aligning our values with our everyday lives and living up the our true potential. You should accept all of who you are and make sure you are doing what you want because it’s what you want and not what someone else wants for you. Make sure you are certain of what you want and why you want it and that it aligns with you’ve belief system. You can change your belief system by simply finding a better belief and you can do this by being open to more than one belief being the best one.

Repetitive and habitual thoughts and behaviors

Creating better thoughts by replacing the ones that are negative and have a negative impact are a vital step in the process. Our subconscious is most accepting while it’s in the delta state. See we have different frequencies or speeds, our brain capacity functions. Delta being the lowest frequency is the state right as we’re falling asleep and the few minutes as we’re waking up. This is the most effective time to reprogram the subconscious mind. What I suggest doing is finding an audible to listen to when you go to sleep that is positive and to your liking. Now they say a habit is formed in 21 days but lets round that up to 30 simply because a little more is better than a little less right. So for 30 days give yourself a different routine to follow including all the things we’ve discussed here today. Make sure to actually stick to them EVERYDAY for 30 days then come comment and let me know how well this article worked for you.

Balancing the Scales

How to handle resentment and unresolved issues!

It’s almost inevitable in any relationship even with yourself, to not have resentment that builds overtime. Most of the time it’s caused from unresolved issues. Either you’re not being heard, not speaking up, or just trying to ignore the issue. Over the course of your life you probably have more unresolved issues than you’d like to admit. (I know I did, hell still brewing a few) 😅 Nevertheless how do we start to solve the issues we aren’t even fully aware of? Problems always come from a much deeper place than just the surface. The only reason they go unresolved and build resentment is not being fully and consciously aware that they exist. So the question remains what can we do to resolve them and not let them cause havoc in our life? The answer is simple although it’s not easy.

ASK MORE QUESTIONS…

Say you’re irritable and taking your frustrations out on your significant other. (Subconsciously) you end up punishing yourself. However, you’re not really focused on finding out why you’re upset, There’s an internal part of you ( your subconscious) that’s always working against you. I’ve learned to listen more to my heart than my mind, but in order to do this, I have to remain very self aware. I’ve taken the time and effort to discover myself at my core and understand the why behind the why…. I’ve figured out all my triggers, all my deepest frustrations, my patterns, my core values and my BS which is what I call my (belief system).

I learned how to become neutral to others and their beliefs, not let them upset me or affect me as much. I did this by asking more and more questions about the thoughts I had and my language patterns. Changed what I did not like with habitual behavior and started to accept all of my flaws and imperfections and love who I am. Truth be told if we’re ok and can accept these flaws then these things are only a problem for others to accept. Just don’t change who you are to please others, because that only leaves you feeling unworthy and insignificant to whoever you rely on for emotional support.

Balancing the scales — Download a list of fundamental values

Resentment is created from our resistance!

When we aren’t even honest with ourselves half the time how are we supposed to be honest with each other? More often than not we tell ourselves little white lies from our subconscious, just so we can feel better about the person we are and the decisions that we make. You’d have be a freaking saint if you’ve never done anything, that later you felt ashamed of, at least once in your life, right? I think we’ve all been there. So going back to that feeling of shame and guilt, allow that feeling to exist within you. If you just sit with yourself and allow yourself to feel the sadness and regret for a few minutes. By doing this unique method our body, mind and spirit realign and balances out the scales within the universe. Otherwise not taking the time to “deal” with that emotion only creates resistance within us at our core and our subconscious.

Fundamental Core Values

We know at our core that what we did we should be ashamed of because of our belief system (which can be changed btw). However, now because we didn’t take that time of pain and discomfort (as our subconscious knows we should be punished for the shame), it now creates our own self destruction path because it is still trying to resist that feeling of shame. It’s now an internal conflict that creates a punishment within ourselves. This is why it’s so very vitally important that we work out these core values of ours and make sure the decisions we make align us with who we are at our core self. Having these core values allows us to really discover who we are fundamentally and why.

Core Values

So what are core values and why are they so important?

Core values are what you believe, and they represent a person’s highest priorities. They are traits or qualities within all of us that make us unique. Some examples of pretty common core values are:

Respect
Integrity
Honor
Loyalty
Responsibility
Courage
Honesty
Love
Dignity

You can set a good example just by having the most important core values and actually living by those values. It allows you and others a smoother friendship as well as helps you feel like a good person. Having core values is especially important when you have kids. As parents we want better for our kids and teaching them the fundamental core values and meaning of those values will only benefit both parent and child. There are different kinds of values, such as;

Personal Values – Behavioral and Traits:

Personal Values – Rights and Causes

Life Values – Core Values

As a race, we are beginning to ask questions, more powerful and incisive questions about who we are and why are we here. These questions are both taking us down a dark rabbit hole of uncertainty and fear – as well as helping us ascend into the light.
It’s a time of deep introspection and exploration into the very nature of who we are as individuals and as a race. How we choose to represent ourselves in this life and in the universe, as well as an investigation into exactly how deep the rabbit hole goes in societal terms. What has brought us to this point of the abyss or ascension?

The problem for each and everyone of us is a simple question, that will determine the future of the human race. The most important question of our lives, and it’s only now
that we get to ask it of ourselves in earnest… Can we accept that we can be more than we are? This is a difficult personal question for all of us to answer, as by association this means we’ve been less than we could have been — and thus we are less than we can be.
Egotistically, this is very difficult to accept for most people in an actionable way, as illusory superiority twists our perspective reality away from our potential.

So set in our ways of personal limitation and identity are we, that we deny to ourselves our birthright of what the true nature of freedom is. The freedom to explore ourselves and the
experience of life, beyond what we’ve been conditioned to or suppressed by. Unfortunately, society psychologically lobotomizes people (including you and me) so they conform to its structures of certainty and behaviour to serve its energetic agenda.

It does this to us from around the age of five in many ways that become part of our identities, so we lose exactly who we really are and forget our potential in terms
of our capacity to live in a state of joy, peace, curiosity, love and wonderment.

Consequently, we fall asleep, and in that slumber we are reluctant to wake as our minds languish in a state of unconscious conformity to a world that makes no sense,
but asks us to live in non-sense and inversion. For some, they thank their lucky stars for their mental prisons, that allow them to navigate a world with pain and suffering inside and outside, so long as they don’t see it in front of them — as it makes them uncomfortable — it reminds them on a very deep level of what they’ve traded in for the addiction to having and not being.

Meaning, Purpose and Destiny

In this limited way, they can move within an inauthentic social identity avatar that is primarily restrictive and self-serving, unconsciously creating their projected reality through the words and thoughts of their daily lives. Thus the mind becomes a prison, a place of security and a sense of certainty — that simply cannot look beyond the shores of what we call an “island of certainty in the sea of eternity”. In this state, we unconsciously choose to look the other way, and deny that there is anything more to our existence.

The inverted societies we live within happily confirm this state of ignorance in every way possible, so we conform to a useful social role and a life that makes no sense beyond being a generator of wealth and an unconscious consumer without the thought of WHY? The why behind the why behind the why behind the why behind the why … and that’s where the core values come into the picture. See if we are grounded by our fundamental core values and live by them without selfish monetary gain, then we’d be a lot happier. I have found that the more aligned with who we are at our core gives us more of a satisfaction. A satisfaction that most people are steadily chasing and are left empty and depressed.

It’s not easy to find your purpose in life and most don’t until later in life if at all. However a bit of soul searching and unplugging from the world while you do it, helps tremendously. We are all to distracted by things that shouldn’t matter yet somehow we don’t even know how we got here. Before you go out into the world all willie nillie without a plan or strategy in place you should know, that kind of instability will lead you right back to square one every time. Take some time for yourself, find out what you like doing and what you’re good at doing as well as what makes you feel good about yourself. Doing something more with ourselves fills a void that keeps us from spiraling into darkness and depression.

Having more isn’t necessarily being more…..

Generational Trauma: A New Perspective

What is generational trauma?

When we have internal emotional pain we find ways to cope with that pain that can hurt ourselves as well as others. Everytime, I hurt people I was just reacting to my own internal pain. I was struggling with my own self worth. I was defending myself because I felt it was necessary, only because of the way I’d been conditioned to think about certain situations.

So many of us live in cycles of projecting our generational trauma onto other people. It never goes well when we do that! No one wins especially not you. The people in your path are also punished or hurt, although that is never the intention, and most of the time we don’t even understand those subconscious feelings that have went un-resolved all those years.

What are symptoms of generational trauma?
👉Low self esteem
👉Depression
👉Anxiety
👉Insomnia
👉Anger
👉Self destructive behaviors
👉Fear

👉Everyday is a battle against yourself…
👉Am I good enough?
👉Can I really do this ?
👉You have thoughts like “what was i thinking”?

Who is most affected by generational trauma?

Anyone can be affected by generational trauma, most don’t even realize they are affected until we dig a little deeper. Being systematically exploited, enduring repeated and continual abuse mentally, emotionally or physically, racism, and poverty are all traumatic enough to cause genetic changes.

Knowing what aligns with who you are and what you know to be is key to being able to see your own truth. If you know that you are amazing and can achieve your goals then understand your own awareness of what others may project onto you. Being conscious of your thoughts and why you believe something to be true is essential.

Generational trauma is a traumatic event that began prior to the current individuals generation and has impacted the way someone understands, copes with and lives their life.

It’s up to you to change Generational narratives;
when they tell you “this runs in the family”, you tell them; “This is where it runs out.” When they say we’ve always been this way, you say “well not anymore, it’s time for a change”.

Do your thoughts really belong to you, or are they other people’s thoughts? We as a society have been in a certain environment our whole lives and what we hear actually becomes what we begin to believe ourselves. So it’s definitely important to understand which thoughts are yours and which ones came from other people doubting you!

As you’ve noticed we live in such a negative environment with chaos and fear all around us. Do you think what you believe is only because of what is socially acceptable by others.

Or is it something you believe and why? We need to uncover our own truth so your not fighting yourself all the time as to what the right thing is . Becoming aware of your values and beliefs are vital in aligning your thoughts with your core.

You have a chance to break the cycle of passing sadness and that traumatized childhood onto your child. Don’t we all deserve better from each other? Children really are put under so much more pressure these days just because of how much our parents messed us up and unknowingly we are doing the same thing to our kids.

How we deal with things make all the difference.

I noticed the other day that I was just a little irritated at my 3 year old, (Sometimes moms’ just need a break) and I caught myself snapping at her. She was only repeating a question cause I hadn’t answered her but it annoyed me.

Before I knew it I was on my knees hugging her because I scared her when I raised my voice and she began to cry. I also realized, I do that more than I’d like to admit. Right then and there I made a promise to myself to fight the irritability, take a moment when needed and become more patient and explain things in a more clearer way so she wouldn’t ever have to feel that rejected hurt and tone in my voice. See small changes like this can make a world of difference for generations to come.

Do you feel like you are alone in the world? That nobody is really there for you? Maybe you are really independent and you pride yourself on that, but deep down, you are afraid of depending on anyone because it might make you look or feel weak?

Do you sometimes wonder why you’re not happier? Do you look around you, and see other people who seem to have some secret ingredient in life that you lack? Do you sometimes feel empty, alone, or unfulfilled deep down? Like you have this barrier between you and everyone else and you are always on the outside looking in?

I study social psychology and I have found this pattern of struggles in people. It’s a pattern that no one talks about.

In fact, it’s so invisible that there’s no universal term to name it or describe it. So i call it what it is Childhood emotional disconnect or (CED) and I want to help you become aware of what it actually is. Even the best and most loving parents can fail their children in this way.

Many are simply raising their children the way they were raised themselves, unaware that they are failing to provide a crucial ingredient to their growing child. This is part of what makes CED so invisible. But the message that you get as a child is: Your Feelings Don’t Matter.

And since our emotions are the most deeply personal and biological part of who we are, we hear this message as,

“You don’t matter.”

So, you adapt to keep your parents happy, and you push your feelings down and away, so that they won’t bother anyone. That strategy works well for you as a child, but as an adult, you start to notice that you feel numb or empty.

You have a hard time relating to other people and expressing yourself. You may have difficulty knowing what you want or what you need or what you feel. You may even feel ashamed for having feelings and needs, and get angry at your own mistakes, or for simply being human.

Another way that parents can unwittingly emotionally neglect their child is to fail to give him the structure and rules to live by, like consequences and discipline. As a result, the emotionally neglected often struggle with self-discipline as adults.

Whatever the level of parental failure, the emotionally neglected have no childhood memories to explain their difficulties. So, too often, they blame themselves. To this day, Emotional Neglect has been overlooked. Because it’s invisible, unmemorable, and the absence of something (emotional validation).

It has been greatly overshadowed by more visible, but also worthy topics, like childhood events, abuse, or trauma.

My goal is to shine a light on this powerful but invisible force. To give people a common language to talk about it, and to offer an explanation to the scores of people who are suffering in silence, wondering what is wrong with them. Understanding the issue can better help you to deal with it in a more healthy way. Addressing these issues emotionally lets you put the pieces together that make you whole.